Is There a Relationship Between Housework and Sex?

Francis Githinji

Nowadays, men are more free with carrying out household chores than in the yesteryears. According to a study in the university of Michigan's Institute for social research, a third percentage of men are doing house work. In 1976, men used approximately six hours every week in house work but since the year 2005 the hours have increased to thirteen. The interesting thing is that, women housework weekly hours were cut from 26 to 17. The source was reliable since it was based on health, economics, and social data obtained from thousands of families. In a woman's point of view, when a husband helps with the housework it is the ultimate expression of care and concern. This translates into reduced stress and more relaxation. This explains the real connection between housework and sex. When a guy is stressed, he might want to burn it out by making love. Women are different since they need to relax in order to feel romantic and want sex.

Women are more likely to find these kind of men to be more romantic. A relationship between housework and sex can be explained in that when two partners engage in house chores extra time is created allowing time for foreplay and sleep. Women confessed of being overly turned on by husbands who help them do the house work. For instance if the dishes are full in the sink and the food is yet to be cooked the husband knows that the woman will be reluctant to get intimate before the chores are all done. If the wife has so much to do and the husband is oblivious, the wife might result to being resentful. Wives like it when the household chores are shared but they also think that husbands intentionally create more work for them. This proves that it is not an easy task to make a relationship work. A lot of work is done to maintain a relationship.

Both the wife and the husband dream of a happy and clean home but a wife contributes more to the tidiness. Research has shown that men create more house work. It might not be doing the dishes or mowing the lawn but emotional labor. The wives are left with chores like organizing family gatherings, planning family medical opportunities or buying and organizing Christmas gifts. No matter the findings the research says that the equality in labor can never be achieved as long the invisible labor is a responsibility of the woman. Much accumulated house work can result into mental stress if it is mismanaged. There are gender dynamics which are wide sweeping all the family people in America and especially in the housework field. Women and especially house wives are most of the time moody by the time the partner gets home in the evening. There must be a connection between housework and sex because carrier women have been reported to be more sexy.

An information architect and also a father of two twins who was interviewed said that he can never regret the time he spends parenting or house keeping as it has proved to be very fruitful. He said it creates a very healthy romantic relationship with his wife. Such men might be few but they are the most sought after. Interestingly, the more the husbands help, the more the wives are happy in marriage but the husbands are less happy in the marital status. I do not love house work and i doubt if anybody does but it has to be done as an expression of shared couple hood. If it is shared off course sex is shared and so the spirit of sharing will be evident in the couple. The relationship between housework and sex is just that strong.
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Stomach Exercise To Lose Belly Fat

Marine of the United States Marine Corps runs ...Image via Wikipedia

Chung Leong Yu

There is no magical gizmos or high tech gadgets to help you get your abdominal muscle. You have to exercise to flatten stomach and get a lean, defined six-pack. Your dream of getting a sexy body with flat and trim abs is within your reach! Sculpt up with lower abdomen exercise and get rid of those love handles with exercise. Here is how!

Stomach Muscle Exercise

A good abdominal workout program requires high intensity muscular overload and an increase in intensity progressively. Stomach exercise must be performed carefully so that the lower back is supported properly.

Stomach exercise can help build the entire abdomen region because the upper and lower abdominals are not separated and are connected. Of course, there are some stomach exercises that can help build and strengthen specifically the lower and upper abdominal muscles.

Abdominal exercises can help you also gain strong stomach muscles and back muscles. This can reduce the likelihood of back pains and provide protection against injury by efficient response to stress.

Lets have a deeper look into the muscles in the abdominal area. The Rectus abdominals is the muscle that stretches down the stomach from your ribs to the hips. The external and internal oblique run down the sides of the waist and their job is to rotate the torso and assist the abdominals during curling and twisting movements.

Stomach exercises are needed to tone or harden the muscles in that area. Not only that, the layer of body fat that is covering the abs must be burn off and this could be only done with proper eating plan. Try to increase your protein intake and limit your carbohydrates, eating a low carbohydrate diet is said to be one way of tackling flabby abs along with a sensible abs exercise routine, strength training and cardio exercise.

Stomach exercise

Stomach exercise must be followed religiously and is all about frequency rather than intensity. No exercise must be continued if it leads to pain or extreme discomfort. The best stomach exercise program can also help you achieve a flat and tight stomach. Many an abs exercise can be performed on the floor. Like any other muscles, the abdominal muscles will react to resistance training like bicep curls and crunches.

A simple pelvic tilt performed while sitting in a chair can strengthen your abdominal muscles and help support the back.

Best Stomach Exercises

Crunch

Lay on your back and knees bent, lift your shoulders off the floor. The emphasis is on moving the ribs towards the hips.

Reverse Curl

Lay on your back, bend your knees towards the chest. Keep the hips on the floor. Contract your abdominal muscles at the same time. Your lower abdominal exercise program must include reverse curls.

Leg raise

Single leg raise involves raising one leg from the floor. The double leg raise involves raising both legs from the floor at the same time and this works as an abdominal muscle exercise. Lying leg raises are ideal lower abdominal exercise

Abs exercise with the ball

The stability ball is an effective training device for the abs and lower back. Due to the curve of the exercise ball, the lower abdominal muscles get trained better on account of the greater range of motion.

Bicycle

It was ranked the best abdominal exercise by the American Council on Exercise. When performed with the abs muscles pulled, this exercise does great things for you.

Plank

For this exercise program, you need to position yourself for a pushup and hold the pose. Ensure that your body is in one long, straight line from head to toes.

Captains chair

This abs exercise involves standing on a gym chair and gripping the handholds. Press your back against the head pad and slowly lift your knees towards your chest. The back must remain straight.

Postnatal stomach exercise

A lot of women just cannot wait to get back in shape after childbirth. But before they can participate in any postnatal weight loss exercise program, they have to consult their doctor first.

Pelvic tilts and simple abs contractions are an ideal way to start on a postnatal lower abdomen exercise program. Combined with Kegels exercise, you can get your pelvic floor muscles back in shape. Isometric contractions can even be practiced with the baby on your stomach. Stick to a steady lower abs exercise program and watch the flabby skin harden.

Stomach exercise to flatten stomach

Getting a lean defined six-pack abs is a dream for most of us. Millions of dollars are spent yearly in the process of achieving a flat stomach and trim waistline. There are many gadgets that are sold to those seeking an exercise program getting the stomach fat down.

The first step towards a lean waist and flat stomach is to remove the fat that sits on the abs. A combination of cardiovascular exercise program coupled with a low fat diet aimed at preventing fat can do wonders. Stomach exercise program would include the following:

Forward flexion exercises such as sit-ups and crunches.

Rotational exercises such as trunk rotations and standing twists

Stomach Exercise for love handle

Love handles are a misnomer, as all women would love to shun them. Love handles are the ugly fat belts around the waist. This lump of flesh starts at the side of the bra-line and extends all the way down the back. Aerobic exercise aimed at this region can help you shed those love handles. Exercise for love handles involve exercising the oblique muscles to tighten up the sides of the waist. Abs crunches could also do the same.

Here is an easy stomach exercise for the oblique that you can do at home.

Sit upright with a stick across the back of your shoulders. Twist from side to side. Side bends also work wonders on love handles. Keep at it and watch these muscles firm into place.
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What are the Best Fat Burning Exercises?

The Cross Trainer exercise machine can be used...Image via Wikipedia

Gen Wright

Seeking answers to what are the best fat burning exercises? If you are like many people you may be confused as to which exercises burn fat more effectively. After all there are many different articles and experts that have different answers or secrets to burn fat.

Some will tell you the low to moderate aerobic exercises are the best fat burning exercises while others believe it is the high impact aerobics that burn fat best. And then there are those who will tell you strength training is best for burning fat. So with all these experts giving different advice, how can you determine what?s the best for you.

The truth is all these experts are correct. Both strength training and aerobics, at any level, will help you burn excess body fat. Aerobic exercises are the most effective at burning calories and fat while performing the exercise while strength training gives you the benefit of increasing your metabolism. With a higher basal metabolic rate, you will be burning more calories each day while doing every day activities including sleeping.

So if all these methods help shed fat, why is it important to know the best fat burning exercise? Well if you are trying to maximize your fat burn then you need to understand how each exercise will help so that you can pick the most effective workout routine.

Strength Training

Strength training exercises are those exercises that challenge your muscles through resistance. The higher the resistance the more challenge the exercise will be. Although strength training itself is not a high calorie or fat burning exercise, it does help tone and strengthen your muscles and increases your lean muscle mass. The more lean muscle mass you have the more calories you burn due to an increased metabolic rate.

Weight lifting offers the most versatility for adjusting the resistance. You can continually increase the weight and challenge to your muscles. However not everyone has access to weight lifting equipment nor do they necessarily need to perform weight lifting to increase their muscle mass.

Resistance band exercises and dumbbell exercises are a great alternative to weight lifting. With resistance bands, you can easily adjust the resistance to your muscles by shortening the band for higher resistance or loosening for lighter resistance. They are fairly inexpensive and easy to travel with so they make a great on the go exercise.

Dumbbell exercises also are fairly inexpensive and easy to store. You can buy several sizes so that you use heavier weights for higher resistance and lighter weights for less resistance. You can also do body weight exercises where you are just using your body and gravity to provide the resistance. The bottom line is that any strength training exercise that helps you build lean muscles will help you burn fat.

Aerobic Exercises

It is aerobic exercises where there is the most debate as to which exercise is best to burn fat; low to moderate intense level or high intense level aerobics. With the low to moderate intense aerobic workouts your body uses approximately 60% of fat for fuel. However, the low to moderate level aerobics also burn fewer calories overall as compared to high impact aerobics.

The high impact aerobics will give you a higher calorie burn overall but only use about 35% of fat for fuel. Hence the reason for the debate and confusion as to which is the best fat burning exercise routine.

To best understand the difference between the two types of aerobics, let?s use an example. For instance, if a man weighing 175 pounds took a brisk walk at 4 mph for 30 minutes, a low to moderate level aerobic exercise, he would have burned approximately 158 calories. If 60% was fat, he would have burned about 95 fat calories.

Now if this same man jogged or ran for 30 minutes at 6 mph, a high impact aerobic exercise, he would have burned about 420 calories with 147 of these calories coming from fat; or 35% of total calories burned. So you can see he had the highest total calories and fat calories with the high impact aerobic workout.

Unfortunately not everyone is at a level in their exercise routines to be able to keep up this fast pace for this amount of time. So let?s assume that this man ran for only 20 minutes instead of the full 30 minutes. In this case he would only burn 280 calories total and 98 fat calories. Even with the shorter duration of the high impact aerobics he was able to burn more calories as well as a few more fat calories.

Again this is a high impact level and if you are not in a position to run at this pace for even a few minutes, then your best fat burning exercise will be a low to moderate level aerobics. To increase both the total calories burned and the fat calories try increasing the duration of your low to moderate aerobic workout.

As you begin to adjust to your aerobic workouts, try increasing the speed as well. Mix up your aerobic exercises by doing low to moderate level with spurts of high impact aerobics. This high impact interval training exercise will give you the benefit of both low to moderate to high impact aerobics calories and fat burn. So make the most out of your fat burning exercises.
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Common Types of Sleeping Disorders and Their Natural Cures

A pillowtop mattress (U.S.Image via Wikipedia

daveclark

Sleeping disorders have become quite common among people nowadays especially among the youngsters. It wouldn’t be wrong to call sleeping disorder a common problem of the youths. There are a lot of factors responsible for it such as late working hours, excessive intake of caffeine throughout the day, taking heavy meal just before going to bed, lack of physical activity, hectic work schedules, binging on unhealthy fast foods and increasing stress level.

In this article, we will give you a brief on the most common types of sleeping disorders. So read on…

There are basically three types of sleeping disorders; the most predominant being Dissomnia.

Dissomnia: Dissomnia is one of the most common types of sleeping disorders. It happens when there is a disruption in the body’s natural mechanism of resting. This usually happens when the atmosphere around you is not congenial for sleep. When there is too much of lighting or noise, it disturbs your sleep.

Parasomnia: Parasomnias are of different kinds with a different symptom in each form. One of the most common forms of parasomnia is confused arousal in which you wake up unconsciously and start walking. This problem in common term is known as sleep walking. Another common type of parasomina is sleep terror also known as night terror in which the person wakes up in a panic state. It is usually associated with a loud scream. There are many more types of parasomnias but these are the most common ones.

Proposed Disorders: these are the rest related sleeping disorders. When due to reasons like long hours of working or shift duties, a person is not able to get adequate sleep; it gives rise to a new type of sleeping disorder commonly called proposed disorder. In such cases, if the period of sleeping is unusual then it is considered to be a sleeping disorder. Proposed disorders are the common types of sleeping disorders.

Natural Cures for Sleeping Disorders

Natural cures are always better. Exercise regularly as it will help keep several diseases away. Eat nutritious food rather than hogging on fast foods and other junk foods. Take green tea as it is very relaxing and stress relieving. In addition to it, it is also a good idea to change your mattress and replace it with a memory foam mattress that provides cushioning effect and gives immense comfort to the body.

You can look for other natural means as well to treat your sleeping disorders.
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5 Ways That You Can Balance Your Children's Busy Schedule With Your Own

In our swift paced world, everybody is busy and has a full schedule. Besides the fact that you and/or your husband work all day, your youngsters probably also have a schedule after school for extra curricular activities. Three o’clock ballet for your youngest one, four thirty soccer practice for your son and six o’clock picking up the oldest from the library and then dinner? Sounds nuts, but when you have a few children, how can you balance all the schedules without running crazy and without leaving out anybody?

Before you start to change anything on your bustling schedule, put aside a small bit of time for the following helpful 5 steps to balance the schedule.

1. Examine your schedule. Make up or print out a calendar that shows your activities on a daily basis. If you need help with this, there are numerous helpful places you can go to online that will give you a free webbased or downloadable calendar. Like Google Calendar for example.

Make sure that your calendar specifically indicates all the events and activities in a day. It would be best to actually split up the calendar in a way that shows what each family member does at what time. This will help you to look for schedules that clash. It is easy to see on a schedule why you are struggling getting your children here, there, and everywhere. Oftentimes a too busy agenda can produce fatigue for everyone and behavior problems in the children.

2. Analyze. After breaking down your schedule, it's time now to see what you want changed and what you want to accomplish with your new schedule. Do you want your youngsters to come home and do their homework before leaving to visit or playing with friends? Do you want family dinner every night or possibly a tranquil family breakfast each morning? It's important to integrate the essentials needed for balance into your family's new schedule.

3. Write it down. Almost as essential as analyzing and then figuring out what it is you actually want, is the step to write your thoughts and ideas down. The process of studying and brainstorming is only helpful when you can get to a written solution. Written thoughts and ideas do not get lost and get more often set into reality than those not written down. When writing down your thoughts and ideas, make certain to include your family into the process.

It is very probable that you will get your kids to argue over it. At this point it is important not to give in to their begging or their tantrums and to stand a hard ground. Your family’s desires are what brought your family on the crazy schedule in the first place. Introduce your family to the new schedule in a cool, positive manner, emphasize what is good or even improved about this new schedule and maybe tell them what was wrong with the old schedule, how it left you and everyone else unsatisfied and dissatisfied.

4. Follow it. Conform to the new schedule for at least one week. Check the schedule for the
actions to be finished today and make sure that you do not let in anything else. Do not add to the schedule for the first week. Teach everybody to look at the schedule at the beginning of the day and also make sure that they check it and stick to it in the flow of the day. If the schedule holds chores, get everybody to be responsible for their participation in the housework.

5. Be Flexible. Finally, it's key to be flexible until you find the right balance. So after the first week of sticking with your schedule, dissect how the week went. Do there need to be any tweaks or modifications made to accommodate a family member or two? If so, no problem. But don't add too much or make too many changes. The schedule needs to flow until it's natural. Inserting massive changes into your schedule day by day or week by week won't work. So follow your schedule and make slight tweaks until you have balance back in your life again as a result of a low key schedule that you and your whole family can follow.

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10 Common Mistakes Made by Women in Fitness & Nutrition

A picture taken, of A Green Salad.Image via Wikipedia

Reynaldo Stephens

While these misconceptions surely exist among men, they seem more common among women. Perpetuated by the media, fads, and fashion magazines that carelessly dispense fitness advice, these mistakes are almost ingrained and therefore hard to shake. Below is my response.

1. I Need To Lose Weight

When speaking about fitness and nutrition, this is the most common phrase uttered by women. While it is true that many overweight individuals (both men and women alike) need to lose drastic amounts of weight for health reasons, many who utter this phrase want to lose body fat, not weight. What's the difference?

If weight goes down, doesn't body fat follow? Not necessarily. For many, an exercise regimen that includes cardiovascular and resistance training increases muscle while eliminating body fat.

The overall effect is a tighter, more toned physique, but body weight could stay the same or even increase. Therefore, the obsession with numbers on a scale is unfounded; one can greatly improve appearance, enhance fitness levels, and eliminate unwanted fat all while maintaining a constant weight. Focus instead on a combination of body fat measurements in trouble spots and the image in the mirror.

2. I Just Gained Two Pounds!

Again, the numbers on the scale are of little importance in the short run. I hear too many women expressing genuine concern over a fluctuation of two or three pounds in bodyweight.

There are so many factors, none of which have to do with "getting fatter," that could have caused such a minor gain, so there is no need for panic.

For example, an individual should weigh him/herself at the same time every day because the difference in weight between stepping on the scale first thing in the morning on an empty stomach and stepping on the scale after dinner can be quite noticeable. This difference, however, is normal and cyclical.

3. I'm Going On The ____ Diet.

To many women, the word diet implies two things that are notorious saboteurs: deprivation and an end-date. Whether it's the grapefruit diet, Atkins, or some other fad diet in the latest fashion magazine (that's why they're fashion magazines, not health magazines), diets require deprivation. They force the follower to give up enjoyable foods, endure intense hunger or some combination of the two, which usually leads to intense cravings and even more intense binges.

A second thing that diets imply is an end date, a day when the h#llish deprivation comes to an abrupt end. So after that spring break trip, high school reunion, or wedding day, many women gain back even more weight/fat than they originally carried. This is because they feel entitled to finally eat the foods they love after a prolonged diet, and a week of carefree eating somehow turns into a month, then a year.

The way to avoid these pitfalls is to develop healthy eating habits instead of relying on crash diets. Eat nutrient-dense foods in small, frequent meals to stay satisfied and embrace portion control so that you can enjoy the foods that you love.

Exercise moderately, incorporating fun and variety to workouts to avoid burnout and boredom. Health and fitness should be lifelong goals, not 4-week tours de force.

4. I'll Be On The Elliptical If You Need Me.

The idea behind some people's religious devotion to the elliptical machine lies in the belief that since cardiovascular exercise effectively burns body fat, any form of cardio will suffice.

First of all, a nutrient-dense diet combined with both cardiovascular and resistance training is shown to trump diet and cardio alone, but that is not even my main gripe.

Research has consistently shown that the elliptical, although easiest on joints, is worse than the treadmill, stationary bicycle, and rowing machine (not to mention activities such as swimming and intense hiking) when it comes to elevating heart rate and burning body fat. This is due to the fact that movement on these machines relies heavily on momentum and not resistance or the propelling of one's bodyweight. All these months of elliptical training has yielded mediocre results, and now you know why.

5. I'm Going To Give Diet Pills A Try.

Do you know what Yohimbe is and how its affects the body? Do you know why there was so much concern around Ephedra? Do you consume too much caffeine? If you are not intimately familiar with these substances, why would you put them in your body day after day?

Before taking these pills, an individual should consult a physician to assure that he/she is in good health. Diet pills achieve fat reduction and weight loss by stimulating the body's systems (thereby increasing metabolism), which can put extra strain on vital functions and organs such as the heart.

Also, diet pills are just a tool; effort is still required to make every tool perform. Just because you pop a capsule a few times a day doesn't mean that you can eat junk, skip workouts, and achieve that ideal physique.

In short, diet pills should be employed after starting and maintaining a regimen as that last resort to break through a plateau. They can be very dangerous if used improperly or abused or use caution.

6. I'll Have The Salad, Please.

Salads can be a great source of nutrients while being low in saturated fat and simple carbohydrates. The key word is "can." Too many times I see individuals pass up perfectly healthy sandwiches and entrees, opting instead for a salad drenched in dressing, bacon bits, and croutons. These items, loaded with fat and calories while scant on nutrients, will not only sabotage a diet but will often fail to make you full.

In order to construct a truly healthy salad, focus on nutrient-dense, low-calorie items such as spinach, broccoli, tomatoes, etc and mix in some lean proteins, beans, nuts, and low fat cheeses for flavor and texture.

The best feature of salads is the variety that can be created, so keep things interesting and flavorful. If you prefer the mixture of dressing, bacon bits, and croutons with some greens mixed in, you might as well have some pizza or burgers to at least fill you up. As you can see, not all salads are created equal.

7. I Try To Skip Breakfast.

Study after study confirms that individuals who eat a balanced breakfast complete with carbohydrates, protein, and healthy fats lose more weight than those who skip this meal. Why?

After a night of fasting and inactivity (aka sleep), an individual's metabolism is slowed to a crawl. Think of breakfast as the spark that ignites up your body's metabolic fire, setting you up to burn calories for the entire day. More importantly, though, a nutrient-dense, satisfying breakfast prevents overeating later in the day.

While it is true that skipping breakfast equates to zero calories for that meal, it sets you up to consume many more calories throughout the day, when food choices probably aren't the healthiest.

So if your goal is to shed body fat or lose unwanted weight, eat within 45 minutes of waking up. Breakfast can be as simple as a low-fat yogurt with a piece of fruit, so the "I don't have time for breakfast" excuse won't work.

8. I Do Pushups To Get Rid Of My "Batwings."

Some swear by pushups to rid themselves of that unwanted flab around the triceps, others are devotees of crunches to expunge belly fat, while still others try lunging their way to less cellulite on the backside.

Whatever the exercise and whatever the body part, this approach is called "spot reduction," whereby an isolation exercise is performed to tone a specific area. It simply doesn't exist.

You cannot reduce body fat in one spot. While isolation exercises will undoubtedly strengthen the target muscles, the fat surrounding these muscles (and the fat everywhere else on the body) can only be reduced by consistently being in a hypocaloric state (burning more calories than consumed).

This is why anyone with a six pack will tell you that crunches are not the key. So it does not matter if the goal is tighter arms, a small waistline, or a toned backside; decreasing consumption and increasing cardiovascular activity are the paths to success.

9. I Don't Lift Weights. Lifting Will Make Me Bulky.

An overwhelming number of women avoid the weight rooms of local gyms and health clubs because they firmly believe that resistance training, whether it is free weights or machine-assisted weights, will result in an undesirably bulky physique.

This misconception stems from the fact that nearly all men achieve noticeable gains in muscle mass after beginning a weight training regimen. Because it stems from personal observation and is partially true, it is quite difficult to combat.

Yes, regular weight training will result in increased muscle mass. However, there is a certain type of training necessary to achieve these gains in size, training that involves heavy resistance and volume. By keeping the weight at about 40 to 50% of maximum effort and increasing repetitions for a cardiovascular effect, you will notice tone, not bulk.

10. It's Reduced-Fat. I Can Eat As Much As I Want.

There are two pieces of information I would like to convey here. "Reduced fat" is a relative term and just because an item is labeled such does not mean that it is low in calories.

For example, if one serving of a certain food contains 60% of the daily recommended fat intake, reducing that amount to 30% is considered "reduced fat," and will probably even be marketed as "half the fat of the original!"

However, 30% is still a lot of fat for one serving, so considered absolute values like how many grams of fat, carbohydrates, protein, etc. are consumed instead of relative values like "50% less fat." Additionally, reaching fitness goals is largely about calorie intake. More body fat and unwanted weight will be gained by eating 500 calories of a low-fat item than by eating 100 calories of a high-fat item, so keep this in mind.

If there is a loss of control or guilt when eating diet or low-fat items, it is probably better in the long-run to consume the higher-fat, higher-calorie counterparts in moderation.
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Common Allergies And Symptoms

Clumps of yellow pollen on a flower head.Image via Wikipedia

David Silva

Before we discuss common allergies and symptoms, you might find it helpful to have a little background. An allergy is a specific reaction of the body's immune system to a normally harmless substance, one that does not bother most people. Those people who find themselves dealing with allergies will often find they are sensitive to more than one substance.

Common Allergies

There are many types of allergies. The most common are seasonal allergies which result from certain trees, plants, or pollens (birch trees, ragweed, rye grass and timothy grass) in the air at certain times of the year. Approximately 35 million Americans are allergic to pollen (also commonly referred to as hay fever). Pollen is a powder made by flowering plants and trees. Though most people tend to think of pollen season as spring, pollen grains can be in the air in the spring, summer, and fall, depending on the type of tree, grass, or weed.

People can also be allergic to some foods, particularly peanuts, shellfish, milk, fish, wheat and soy. If you're unsure which food allergens are giving you trouble, a visit to your physician or allergist can uncover the guilty culprits. An allergist can perform tests to identify and isolate any specific sensitivity you may have, whether or not they're food related, and the severity of your sensitivities. In addition, since some allergies can be life threatening, the allergist can provide you with instructions on life saving measures to be taken in the event of a severe allergy.

Other common allergies include animal dander (animal hair, cockroach calyx), insect stings (bee venom, wasp sting), dust mites, mold spores, medications (penicillin, salicylates, local anesthetics, sulfonamides), even latex rubber.

Common Symptoms

Symptoms of allergies are classified by degree of severity, including mild, moderate, and severe allergic reactions. Most people experience relatively mild symptoms, such as watery eyes, itchy skin, a runny nose, coughing, and hives. These types of allergy symptoms can usually be controlled by using an antihistamine. There are several over the counter antihistamines, as well as others you can only get with a prescription. You may also want to consider getting an allergy shot.

For other sufferers, the allergic reaction is moderate. In these cases, the reaction spreads to other parts of the body. For instance, you may experience difficulty breathing. Antihistamines, steroids, and immunotherapy can all held remedy the effects.

While very rare, severe allergic reactions do exist. Generally these are the result of food allergies. Peanuts, milk, and eggs are the most common. Symptoms include swelling of the face, abdominal pain, cramps, hives, and angioedema, which are hives inside the throat. Immediate medical attention is generally required for symptoms of a severe allergic reaction. Often a shot can help offset the reaction.

While there is no cure, common allergy symptoms (inflammation, rashes, hives, etc.) can be treated. The best treatment of all, of course, is simply to avoid those factors that trigger an allergy attack (easier said than done).
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21 Parenting Ideas to be a Better Parent

Cover of Cover via AmazonDuring the end of year holidays I like to kick back and put my feet up. I also like to read widely to get some inspiration to help me focus in the coming year.

Here are two quotes I read during my break that really resonated with me:

“If you want better children and a better society then you need better parents.” Maurice Balson.

“Parenting is probably the most important public health issue facing our society.” Professor Graham Vimpani

Thinking about those two quotes helped orientate me and reinvigorate for the coming year. So in this spirit I have listed 21 ideas to guide, inspire and reinvigorate you to become a better parent in 2009. Read the list and choose a couple of ideas to focus on in the coming months. Often only a small change is needed to make a big impact on your kids.

Here goes:

1. Build traditions in your family.
There is no better way to build memories and bind your family together than to establish your own traditions and rituals. Traditions anchor kids to their families as well as to their childhoods. Tradition can be translated as “this is the way we do things in our family.”

2. Build self-belief in kids.
It is self-belief rather than ability that holds many kids back from really achieving their best. Put effort into ‘developing the courage to be imperfect’ so that kids aren’t afraid of messing up. It is through mistakes that kids learn and grow. Learn more in Bringing out your Child’s self-confidence.

3. Build self-knowledge in kids.
Self-knowledge is the best knowledge that kids can have. The best way to do this is to develop the habit of describing kids being good. When they do something special (or not so-special) tell them what they have done. ‘I love the way you greeted your nana with a smile. You’re really good with people.” This becomes part of their internal self-reference system as it was told to them by a significant adult in their life.

4. Encourage kids to be self-occupiers.
Kids’ ability to keep themselves occupied cannot be underestimated. Avoid rushing in when they seem bored. Suggest ideas rather than provide entertainment. Self-occupiers readily get into the state of flow and get lost in play which is great for achievement and mental health.

5. Balance boredom with busyness.
Leave some spaces in kids’ schedules for some hang-time and muck-around time. These are good for building family relationships and promoting mental health.

6. Encourage a sense of generosity.
Moving kids from ‘me’ to ‘we’ takes work these days. Encourage kids to volunteer, give some pocket money to charity and give away unused toys to develop their sense of ‘other’.

7. Parent differently for each child.
You can bet your bottom dollar what worked with one child won’t work with another so be flexible with your behaviour management, communication and relationship-building skills. Read Why first borns rule the world and last borns want to change it.

8. Consciously model the behaviours you want.
Kids will sometimes do as you say but will always do what you do. If you want them to be generous and kind-spirited then you have no choice but to be generous and kind-spirited yourself.

9. Have at least five family mealtimes a week.
Sitting down and breaking bread together as family or group builds strong families and gives you the chance to talk. If you want to influence your kids and their thinking then you need to talk with them more. Mealtimes provide these opportunities.

10. Build redundancy into your parenting.
You don’t want you kids living with you when they are forty so you had better start making yourself redundant right now. Some people wait for a certain age before they let kids do for themselves. Build scaffolds to independence from the earliest possible age. Teach them, then give them opportunities to be self-sufficient. Even three year olds can make their bed – just not as well as when they are ten.

11. Give kids a map and a compass.
Just as explorers need a map and a compass to guide them when they enter unknown territory, kids need a map and a compass to guide them when they meet with difficult and different situations. The map they have is made up of what they know of you and your life story. This helps them work out smart from less than smart behaviour. The compass is the made up of the values that you live so they know right from wrong.

12. Make it easy for kids to behave well.
Kids usually want to behave well but many find behaving well hard. Make it easy for them not by lowering your standards but by giving gentle reminders, setting up simple routines and giving simple verbal cues. Read One Step Ahead or learn more in Bringing out Your Children’s Best Behaviour.

13. Teach kids to be financially smart.
Financial smarts begins at home. Give them pocket-money on a regular basis and allow them to take some control over their spending. Avoid being their own personal ATM and don’t give them money whenever they want it.

14. Help kids appreciate what they have.
Some children have a default mechanism that is both negative and self-centred. Encourage them to look on the bright side and be thankful for what they have rather than always wanting more or focusing on what they don’t have.

15. Focus on feelings not just behaviour.
Next time a child asks for an extension to bedtime because they doing a fun activity resist going into behaviour management mode and move into emotional intelligence mode. “It’s great to see you happy and really enjoying that game. What’s it like having so much fun?” Then move them to bed while you are listening.

16. Understand child development.
Some stages are harder than others and different stages require different things of kids. Early childhood is about bonding and then breaking away. Middle childhood is about developing competencies and self-esteem and adolescence is about identity formation and breaking away. Each stage has its own joys and challenges for parents. Appreciate each stage and don’t wish them away.

17. Build mental health skills.
The World Health Organisation predicts that mental health will be the biggest health issue in the developed world over the next few decades. Teach kids good mental health skills at home by helping them relax and unwind, deal with anxiety and talk about their every day challenges without fear of being judged.

18. Be the hope person in their life.
Life can sometimes suck when you are a kid. Offer kids hope that things will get better or that they will get used to difficult situations. Help them set goals or do something that will help alleviate a difficulty. Learn about Resilience in Bring out your Child’s resilience.

19. Focus on relationships, not rules.
It’s hard to fight when you get on with someone so make sure you have something in common with each of your kids. The love languages approach (Google Love languages) offers a framework that will help you connect with each of your kids.

20. Build layers of community around kids.
Family, friends, teachers, coaches, people in the broader community form a protective circle around kids, help keep them safe and prevent them from falling through the cracks. Encourage a sense of community. Let them bring friends home. Encourage them to take up community-based activities and value relationships they have with coaches, teachers and people in their neighbourhood.

21. Attend a Happy Kids Parenting Seminar this year.
Get your blueprints for developing confidence and character in kids at my Bringing out your child’s CONFIDENCE seminars in all mainland capitals in February/March and the Raising WELL-BEHAVED kids seminars in August/September. Both have FREE bonus workshops beforehand where I can answer your pressing questions. Find out how and where, by visiting my website.
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Simple Ways to Make Time for yourself

MIAMI BEACH, FL - JUNE 11:  (L-R) Hector Garci...Image by Getty Images via DaylifeIt's a universal truth that parenting is a tough job - perhaps one of the most tough in the world! After all, there's not a time when you're "off the clock"; between caring for your family, supporting your child's after-school activities and running a household, it can seem almost laughable to make time for just yourself. These days, who has the time?

But if you want to maintain a happy and healthy family - not to mention your own sanity - it's more important than ever to make a bit of time for yourself at the end of a particularly hectic day. As a parent, you need this time to decompress, restore your frazzled nerves and relax those tense muscles. An additional bonus is that once you've taken time for yourself, you'll be able to be a better parent and partner, since you're more relaxed, and less likely to succumb to stress and anxiety.

So how exactly do you find "me" time during the typical hectic day? Easy: just follow these tips and you'll be back to your carefree - or at least, less-stressed! - self in no time!

1.Take a ten minute bath at the end of your day. Once your children are in bed, zone out in a nice and relaxing bath. The warm water will calm and soothe tired muscles, while you'll get a moment to collect your thoughts.

2.Go for a walk on your lunch break. Experts have long known that exercise boosts our happiness and can work wonders on stress, so take advantage of your hour-long break to give yourself a quick pick-me-up!

3.Sing in your car on the way to and from work. If you commute alone, make a CD of your favorite music and sing your heart out like nobody's watching. After all, your commute is probably one of the few times that you'll get a significant amount of time to yourself: take advantage of it by turning into a singing superstar. If that's not your cup of tea, try something else that makes you feel relaxed and stress-free: buy an audio book, call a friend or just simply enjoy the scenery en route to work.

4.Meet up with friends that you haven't seen in a while. It's easy to let weeks, even months, pass without catching up with good friends - so hire a babysitter and make a day of it. You'll have so much fun laughing with old friends that you'll hardly feel frazzled once Monday morning rolls around!

5.Try learning how to meditate or do yoga. These types of physical and mental exercises are no longer for celebrity starlets - in fact, many of your coworkers and friends likely dabble in yoga and meditation themselves! Once you've become practiced in these soothing exercises, it won't take long for peace and tranquility to be restored to yourself again!

6.If you're feeling really exhausted, get your partner to watch the kids while you take a nap. A quick twenty to thirty minute nap will work wonders for your mood and will instantly perk you up; plus, it's not difficult to take twenty minutes out of your day to catch a quick snooze. Just remember to promise your partner the same in return!

In order to be the best parent that you can be, you'll need to make time for yourself once in a while. Try not to think of it as selfish "me" time; rather, focus on the fact that taking a few minutes out of each day to devote to yourself will make you a better mother or father and partner - your family will certainly notice the difference!
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